Unicorn Empire

I’m on AIM all the time and, for some reason, I tend to get some random IM’s, usually about one a month. Normally I just block them but lately I’ve been talking back, out of curiosity.

Gloria: heya!

Me: Hi?

Gloria: hey whats pup? 23 female here. u??

Me: Not much. Just a 2349 Dragon here.

Gloria: hmmm. have we chatteed before?

Me: I’m not sure, but two thousand years is a long time.

Gloria: oh ok. i wasn’t surree. anyways…. whatt’s up?

Me: Oh you know, just eating some unicorns. The usual.

Gloria: im like sooooo borreeddddd … there iss nothingggggg to do

Me: I see you have a hissing problem, you should get that checked out.

Gloria: ohhh waiittt i havve a GREAT idea. have  you ever watchhed a sexy girl like me strip life on cam b4?

Me: No, can’t say as I have.

Gloria: welllll…. you couuuuld watch me if you wanna?

Me: Nah that’s cool, I’m reptilian so, y’know… Humans are pretty gross to me. Since I eat them, and all. That’d be kind of… wrong.